ANGER DECISIONS..HOW TO CONTROL ANGER ?

Anger is a common human emotion. The world and its changing nature has increased the level of anger, has diversified the reasons causing anger.. all in all making the emotion more common. The world we know today is full of frustration which breeds anger. Well, this change is not a welcome change at all.

Happiness today has become a virtue. Today psychologists advise patients to fake happiness in order to cure depression. Fake smile is replacing real smile very fast. And in future too the prospects do not seem promising.

Let's come to anger or rage. If you have gone through my previous blogs you must have noticed I have mentioned about the increasing responsibilities on humans. In ancient times we only had to care about feeding ourselves. But today feeding has a whole new meaning. We can not just go into the forest and collect our own food. We have to work, earn money and then buy our food. And this endless cycle continues till we die.

Increasing population has put pressure on resources. This has increased competition. In this competition only few come out with flying colours and enough money to buy food. All the remaining get their share of failure, guilt, frustration which slowly grows into anger.

The above is the most common cause of anger but it is not the only cause. Apart from economic scenarios, there are social scenarios too that breed anger. This anger can lead to self hurt or one can end up hurting others.

Anger decisions are those solutions to problems that pop up in the mind of angry individuals who are going through hard times. The mental situation of these people does not allow them to analyse the solution/ option that has come before them before going ahead. They just act on it immediately.

The decisions taken in rage are never correct. The solution that seemed appropriate during that moment ends up complicating things even more. Thus it is always advisable not to take any important decision when you are angry. Future outcomes of each action should be taken into consideration before going ahead. All this can only be possible with a practical mind, one which angry people lack. 

Violence, social unrest, terrorism, and all other social and economic evils have their origin inside the minds of angry people who have been completely blinded by rage. They do not think and thus get sucked in by rage. They end up in messy, very messy places.

The only way out of this is by mastering one's emotions. We have to control our emotions and never let emotions get hold of us. Be it happiness or anger, our mind should be calm and deal with both the situations keeping a practical mindset.

Writing down the cause of our anger on a piece of paper can help. This can help us think of solutions that are practical and non-damaging. The time invested in doing this will help our mind calm down and also sooth our racing nerves. This simple step can prevent us from getting washed away by our anger and hence can protect us from anger decisions that would have been immensely damaging both to us and the society.

 Our world has been built by great minds. Minds that were stable. People who control their emotions, can never be hurt. They are socially immune. Situations can never change their peace of mind and their sense of purpose. Because peace of mind to them is a choice and they chose it whatever their surroundings may be. To achieve that we have to let go of anger. This is the true sense of being enlightened. From that point on happiness begins because happiness is no longer dependant on our surroundings rather it becomes a choice. And we chose it over everything every time.         

WHAT TO DO DURING LOCKDOWN ?..QUARANTINE BLOG..

The world is going through tough times. Citizens of many countries are under lockdown for months now. The graphs for the infections are showing spikes and the time ahead does not seem promising. But there is a good side to all these too. In today's blog we will discuss one of the positive impact that this lockdown has on us.

The most important thing that we lacked during our normal work days was time. But now we have abundance of time. All the things we wanted to incorporate in our lives but we could not because we were too busy with our lives can now be brought in and easily adopted. One of them is beneficial habits.

One's need for a habit can be wide ranging. This need depends on one's lifestyle, future aspirations and personal mindset. Some want to adopt to-do list for better organising each day. Some others want to start eating healthy or doing exercise. All these habits can be easily incorporated during this time when we are in the safety of our homes and are having abundant time in our hands.

The need for time has been sorted. Now the next important thing is action. We need to take steps so that all the habits we want can be achieved. Once we have started, almost 90% of our work has been done. Because start is the most important phase of anything.

The small actions that we take now needs to stick and get incorporated into our daily routine as a task. We all know that it takes about 21 days to build a new habit. Thus, our path is clear. We just have to keep taking actions regularly so that it fuses into our daily routine. Once the task just happens on its own and we don't have to push ourselves into doing that, we have successfully made a new habit.

All this can be very overwhelming. But my advice to you all is to take on the things slowly. Everything can not be achieved simultaneously. We have to focus on creating one habit at a time. Once we have successfully built one habit we can shift our focus to the next one.

It's an obligation for us to use this time to our benefit. Start learning new skills, build new habits etc. Once this lockdown is over, we should be able to present to the world a transformed form of ourself. One of which we are proud of. Because you never know whom you might be inspiring.   

Here are some blogs for you to read next.....

https://archishmansardar.blogspot.com/2020/04/a-lesson-learned.html

https://archishmansardar.blogspot.com/2020/04/blessing-in-disguise.html

A LESSON LEARNED..

"Life is the best teacher". This is an old saying, passed on for generations now. But the significance of this saying has not aged at all. The mindful souls, learn each day because life is full of teaching. And it never stops teaching.

In some of my previous blogs, I have talked about humble living and greed free intentions. Both  are very much interlinked. A person who is humble will never be drawn towards greed. He lives a mindful life and draws energy from the fact that endeavours backed with greed never become successful.

The above is not just a fact but rather a truth. The work which begins with greed to back it will never become successful. Rather it would end badly. Many people must have realised it after facing humiliation and I am no exception. I have too learned it the hard way. Indeed life has unique ways to teach us the lessons for life.

The greed I am talking about is not always monetary in nature. It can be the greed for fame, promotion, attention, social upliftment etc. All such greeds blinds the eyes of mind. We start working in a haste. This haste does not allow us to keep track of our movements. With no mindfulness in our task, we have no control. And at the end, everything falls apart along with our greedy aspirations. Thankfully in my case the loss wasn't that big but a lesson is a lesson when we learn from it. I have indeed learned.

Well humans can never be flawless. One can not guarantee that one will never be greedy. It all depends on the situation and how well one can control one's emotions. But at the end the fact remains that our intention behind every work we do should be pure.

There are two other markers that can guide us back to the right path by indicating to us that we are doing something wrong. They are haste and over imagination.

When our judgement is clouded by greed we try to accomplish everything quickly. This haste to reach the end should be an eye opener that something in what we are doing is wrong. We should stop at that point. Reflect upon our task and then proceed mindfully.

The second is over imagination. Once we notice that we are over excited about the end result of our work and we can not stop imagining all good things at the end, we should immediately stop our work and judge the outcomes we are imagining. If the outcomes reflect greed in any form, which they will, we should immediately take steps to correct our wrong.

We should always learn from other's experiences. This would keep our outlook broad and would enable us to face the challenges posed by life with a mindful approach. You can also go through my other works for more such lessons that would definitely help you live a more mindful life. Here are some suggestions:-

https://archishmansardar.blogspot.com/2020/04/blessing-in-disguise.html

https://archishmansardar.blogspot.com/2020/02/silence-perils-of-excessive-talking.html

https://archishmansardar.blogspot.com/2020/02/enhance-productivity-time-slotting-of.html

BLESSING IN DISGUISE..

Human mind is mysterious and human aspirations are boundless. We work for our dreams and then pray that our actions bring fruit or the desired result. Sometimes they do and sometimes they don't. We have placed our faith on a supreme power and we believe that it is by the wish of that supreme power our aspirations are turned into reality. Well humans have still not been able to understand many phenomenons and hence the above is the go to conclusion in those many cases.

We all have regrets. Some of them are linked to our wants and aspirations. The more practical minded among us would regret of having not worked hard enough. While the majority blame their failure ,on the supreme power because they believe it was all destiny. And what is destiny? It is a preplanned course of life designed by the supreme power himself for each and every one of the living beings. We being on the developed side understand that.

As we study and gain deeper understanding of the abstract world, simultaneously we gain insight into our existence. We look back and gauge each and every life changing decisions we have ever taken. We begin to realize that many decisions did not result in the planned outcome. And yet here we are. This is true wisdom. This is what life teaches us. "Uncertainty".

For the unsatisfied souls, this learning can be life changing. Because enjoying this life and the ability to take decisions that comes with it is a privilege. For those who had well written destiny, this wisdom serves as a reminder of volatile nature of human life.

Whatever might be our mindset at the end, one thing we can clearly support, i.e not achieving somethings that our heart desired back then was indeed a blessing in disguise. Call it destiny written by the supreme powers or call it the uncertainty of life, those unfulfilled wishes made us what we are today, brought us where we are today and gave us people we hold dear today. Not every unfulfilled wish is a curse. Life is what it is and we are what we are. If you haven't retraced your life yet, you are missing the opportunity to let go of all regrets and bring in fulfillment and happiness into your life.. 

THINK LESS, WORK MORE..

In life we can achieve things only by working.. All our dreams and aspirations demand our hard work to turn into a reality. There is no denying of the fact that, the harder we work, the luckier we get. Mere wishing for things to happen does not yield results, working does.

I am in no way denying the importance of planning. In fact I have in my previous blogs mentioned how planning gives us a direction and ensures that we do not deviate from our path. But in reality many people do not go beyond the planning phase. However elaborate and detailed our plan might be, but without the push from hard work and sweat we can never get to where we want to reach.

There have been numerous examples where individuals have climbed the ladders of success due to their sheer hard work. Every successful person will tell you how volatile circumstances forced them to change their plans now and then. This is a very important lesson we must keep in mind. Our plans however full proof we might think them to be, can turn irrelevant with changing circumstances. We have to be prompt to adopt ourselves according to the changing demands. That's working smart. Thus, our plans must be flexible.

In all these, hard work remains constant. The importance of working never degrades under changing circumstances. If the pull of the destination in mind is strong enough, working becomes easy and can enable us to overcome the defects in our planning. Keeping this positive motivation in mind, start hustling. Because a plan, without hard work to back it, is nothing but a dream. So stop wasting time in preparing a full proof plan and start working. Everything else will get sorted along the way at the correct time..All the best!!!!!